Verses That Stalk You

There is a verse that has been following me around lately.

I find that sometimes things get to me, get discouraging, make me feel bitter, disrupt my mood, damage my resolve and sometimes just plain make me feel down. On top of some other ways that God has been working on me, one of them is holding my thoughts “captive.” Here is the verse I'm talking about:

2 Corinthians 10:5  "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

Has this ever happened to you? I'm sure it has, if you have ever been exposed to the word. I've noticed that occasionally, especially when God is really trying to get something through to me, a verse will kind of just "show up;" in a song, a television show, a service, a book, a conversation, through my devotional, through a bible study or even just through a friend of mine that speaks it to me.

Lately, I think God has been telling me to keep my thoughts captive...to make them more like something He would think. I really like to think of myself as a non-judgmental person, but recently I've realized that maybe I really am, just in a way I hadn't originally thought. Example: when I forget to do something on my days off when I'm to be fundraising, or when I don't do all the things I've wanted to do because I've been distracted by less important things, I feel very down on myself. And not just a little disappointed because I forgot to write a Thank You card...it's much worse than that. I will literally spiral so deeply that  I'll start to feel like maybe I'm not cut out to be a missionary because,  "*So-and-so* wouldn't have forgotten to write that person!"

This is something I should not do. And there is so much negativity in my mind sometimes that I am unable to come away from it until I take a step back and look at the big picture. Recently, my mom mentioned my occasional issues to a woman who runs an intercessory prayer ministry. The woman very wisely said that when praying, she saw images of me standing in a forest directly in front of a very large tree. What a sense of humor God has...he shows people that I literally cannot see the forest for the trees.

When I spend more time in the quiet with God and in prayer, I find that things get much better. Pray with me that this verse wouldn't follow me around anymore. That I would readily embrace it and learn what God is trying to tell me and put it into practice.

Thanks for reading...Love to you all!

Alison

To Donate:

1. Send your checks made out to ECMI-USA with a separate note with my name, Alison Settle, on it to this address:            ECMI-USA
                                                                             PO Box 181
                                                                  West Unity, OH 43570

2. Click here, specify me, Alison Settle, and you can donate through your amazon.com account.

3. Or for monthly donations via electronic transfer, send a request by email to rebekah.burkholder@ecmi.org

The Journey to Here



ME!



Welcome to the beginning of my documented journeys! My name is Alison Settle, and I have recently been appointed as a missionary to Rostock, Germany with the organization European Christian Mission InternationalEven though my blog is just beginning now, I have actually been in communication with ECMI since January of 2010...and the steps I have taken to get to this point have been going on for even longer..

Five years ago, I made the decision to leave my hometown of Lexington, Kentucky for a grand adventure in Europe. After three weeks of job searching and only another three weeks of loose-end-tying, I found myself living in Munich, Germany as an au pair. Despite having virtually no knowledge of the German language and culture, I managed to make friends and carve myself a lovely niche in that amazing country for 13 months. After my adventure in Europe came to an end, I made my way back home to Kentucky with hopes of cutting any remaining ties to the States and returning to live in Munich permanently. Interestingly enough, God had other plans! I was somehow coerced into attending an Alpha course at the church where I worked. Even though I had spent my first 21 years as a skeptic/agnostic, I reluctantly agreed to go...with the understanding that I would do nothing other than cause trouble and ask lots of difficult questions. Luckily, the patience of those leading the course eventually broke down my “devil's advocate” exterior and made me feel safe enough to ask the real and genuine questions I had been wanting to say for so long. And even though not all my questions were able to be answered, I was being shown the love of Christ through the kindness and support of my friends. Throughout this process of searching and wrestling with God, I continued working on my plans of returning to Germany, but strangely (and not coincidentally), one February night in 2008 a fluke wind storm of tornadic proportions



My poor baby post-destruction.



caused a mature maple tree to collapse upon my precious 1993 Dodge Dakota...effectively cutting my plans short, as I had to purchase another vehicle and this would tie me back down to the States for at least another year or so. After my precious European plans were destroyed, I turned to everything and everyone I could to try to figure out what to do with my life, but to no avail. And so I prayed. I prayed a prayer of desperation and exasperation to God for what I wanted and what I needed and what had been taken away from me. And not more than a month later and four days after my 22^nd birthday, I accepted Christ as my Savior...by surrendering my life to Him after realizing that what I was doing and what I thought was right was not working. Sometimes you have to hit the rock-bottom of darkness before you can see the light clearly enough to move in the right direction.



My Munich trip in September 2008.
Breakfast at the Chinese Tower in the Englischer Garten.



A few months later, in June, I was baptized on my family's farm in southern Indiana surrounded by family and friends. I still wished to return to Munich, but I knew that it had to be the right timing...God's timing. And in August, I found I somehow had acquired just the amount of money I needed to purchase a flight to Munich in September, and I booked. This was a much needed return trip, one I certainly needed to take after my enormous life change. I was able to see everything from a different perspective and reconcile my old life with my new. I suddenly realized that what I wanted most now was to serve God in a place where I felt uniquely prepared to do so...in Europe, specifically Germany. I am by no means an expert in the German language or culture, but I feel my year long crash course as an au pair has left me with a most basic understanding, while my Christian roots come from my life here in Lexington. I have been so nurtured and encouraged here, that I feel I have a strong enough foundation to begin working. I wish to take what I have learned and how I have been lifted up to a place where there is not nearly as much support as I have received...to Europe. And this search brought me to Urbana 2009 where I initially met with ECMI.

At Urbana 2009 (LtoR Lauren, Rachel, Lara and me)

After an intensive application process and finally a trip to Rostock, Germany to meet the team currently working there, I was accepted as an appointee and now I have begun the support raising process. This has been an incredible journey so far, but I know that this particular time will be an even more interesting time and I wanted to document this...all of it. My day-to-day life and how I am able to fit everything together, the frustration, the blessings, the encouragement and even the boring stuff. I wanted anyone and everyone to be able to see this movement from an inside perspective, to be able to comment on it or make suggestions, to enjoy it or to question it. I wish this blog to be an honest portrayal of my life from this day forward and how God acts in it. I hope you will join me!

If you want to help, here are things you could do that would make a world of difference to me:

• Most importantly, pray for ECMI, the team in Rostock and for me as I begin this process.
• Reply to my posts with any thoughts or suggestions you might have.
• Tell your friends about this blog!
• Pray about supporting me financially with a monthly donation. Donations should be designated to me, Alison Settle, are through Amazon.com and are tax-deductible. Just click "supporting me!" :)