Things I Must Sacrifice

A quick jaunt to Amsterdam...a great memory.

Ultimately, I romanticize this life I'm trying to make a reality. It's just going to happen...just like any relationship, as time goes by, you start to think about only the good things, and you forget about the not-so-good things.

I fell in love with Germany when I lived there as an au pair. Everything about it was so different than what I was used to, but it still felt so wonderful. I didn't always feel like I really belonged in Lexington, or that I was satisfied to stay there and so I picked up and left...in that spontaneous haughtiness that one can only achieve (and justify) when one is 20 years old. I lived in Munich during a wonderful time. It was 2006...the World Cup was hosted by Germany that year, and the Summer was full of sunny days spent at the biergartens and Englischer Garten, followed by nights at fantastic bars and dance clubs with even better music. I ate German food, drank German beer, dressed up in my dirndl and enjoyed the world famous Oktoberfest. When Winter came, I feared that all the fun would stop and everyone would huddle down to hibernate...but this was never the case. We perused the Christmas markets with a hot cup of spiced wine and ice skated in Karlsplatz. The action never stopped, and when I think back on my time, these are my fondest and most vivid memories.

At the biergarten, wearing my dirndl for the
first time. June 2006

Cheering on Germany during the World Cup.
June 2006

picture credit: edwardkinsella.com

It's easy to forget the times when I cried on the phone to parents and friends, telling them that I wanted nothing more than to go home...that it was all too hard. The cultural adjustments, the language adjustments, the fact that everyone I knew was either a very new friend or a very distant acquaintance, and so many other hardships. I spent time in a hostel room in Prague tearfully explaining to one of these very new friends everything that was going wrong and why I couldn't bear to continue on anymore. I missed my dog, my cockatoo, my closest and dearest friends who knew me so intimately...I even missed silly things like a real shower/tub combination. I mean, how do you think one takes an effective shower in a contraption like this?

So, it has become important to me, even now, to be superbly intentional about appreciating my life here in Lexington and saying a true and heartfelt goodbye to the things and people I will be postponing or giving up all together. When I left home for my last adventure, I was in every hurry and could not have cared less to abandon everything and start fresh...this time, I know I need to be realistic...to anticipate in advance what I will be feeling, what I will be missing, and what will never come to be now that I have chosen this particular path in life.

Here is a photo series of these sacrifices. Some are trifling, but others are life-altering.

photo cred: qdoba.com

Oh, Qdoba. Dear, sweet, baby qdoba. I will miss your Fajita Ranchera Chicken burrito, your queso and your delicious habanero salsa and all the wonderful times we've had together.

photo cred: marinebiology.com

I will have to put to rest, probably forever, all hopes of ever becoming a marine biologist. It's a dream I've had ever since watching episodes of PBS's "Nature" as a little girl, curled up with my Dad on the couch. I will probably never have the time or opportunity to return to school and finish an education as extensive as what is required for successful scientists.

photo cred: craigrom.com

Taking long, winding drives on the back roads of the thoroughbred farms that surround Lexington. Rolling the windows down at the very beginning of Spring, playing my current favorite music and just celebrating that Winter is finally over. It's a yearly tradition.

photo cred: oldhousedreams.com

I'm going to have to put to rest all the dreams I've had of owning a Victorian home in downtown Lexington. I have always said, "If I have to live in Lexington, I will buy and restore an historic home." Kind of along with this relatively minor dream, I am also having to sort of grieve the idea of raising a family here...of getting married and having children surrounded by this community. I can't know when exactly I'm coming home, and I may stay away until old age. I have to begin saying goodbye to my community now, and start making myself aware of the fact that 20 years from now, the people I'm close to may not be a part of my life at all. I'm not just going on a mission "trip"...I'm turning my life upside down and starting from scratch.

All this being said, I still know that I'm making the right decision. I know that this life, this dream that I'm choosing is the right one for me. When I became a Christian, I turned away from my old life, and so I had to leave some dreams by the wayside in order to leave the way open for the dreams that Christ has for me. This is such a joyful time, knowing that God is blessing me with this enormous opportunity, but I want also to never run into it with a blind optimism. A change this big must come with some time to grieve what will be lost.

Thanks for reading!

Alison

To Donate:

1. Send your checks made out to ECMI-USA with a separate note with my name, Alison Settle on it to this address:            ECMI-USA
                                                                      PO Box 181
                                                             West Unity, OH 43570

2. Click here, specify me, Alison Settle, and you can donate through your amazon.com account.

3. Or for monthly donations via electronic transfer, send a request by email to rebekah.burkholder@ecmi.org

A Daily Struggle for Daily Success

Hello and good afternoon to all!

It is that time again...time for an update on the road to missionaryhood.

As the title suggests, it really is a daily struggle for daily success in the world of potential missionaries. Often times, the milestones that I must reach are so large that I have to take a breath and realize that God will provide if I can just step up to the plate and do my part. Not to say that raising support is something that I necessarily have control over, as I have already clearly seen that God works through many channels, but more that I must continue to show my commitment, dilligence and obedience to God and this calling. 

I will give you an idea of the emotional roller coaster that I am often taking a ride on:

"I have heard from different people lately that they have been intentionally praying for me, and it has all been quite humbling and unexpected. I actually was feeling a little down on myself yesterday for not being as productive last week as I had been the week before, but then my (current) favorite song came on on the way to work, and I immediately just felt this intense feeling of joy, excitement and peacefulness about everything. I realized that I need to keep pushing and pushing hard, and sometimes I won't get everything done or raise as much support as I had hoped, etc., but God still wants me there, that He has provided for me in the past and He will in the future. I also sometimes get so taken aback that I am actually going to be a missionary in Germany...how INCREDIBLE is that?? That God has not only given me this opportunity, but that He is trusting me with it! So, needless to say, I got to work and walked in with cry-face. But, they were tears of joy. :)"

 

This whole process has become so much more than I ever thought it would be... I always thought that things kind of went like this:

 

 

       Point A --------------------------------- Point B

                  (Me now)                             (Some stuff I have to do)                    (Me as a missionary)

 

 

Now, I am quite certain that things look a little more like this:

 

 

Photo Credit: twoagespilgrims.com

Look familiar? It's the path that God led Moses through to get to the promised land. I believe that God is taking me through different rifts and valleys, high points and summits, in order to prepare me the best way He possible. He knows my downfalls and my shortcomings, and He knows what my strengths and skills are. He is using my life now along with all the paperwork, emails, social situations, financial situations and presentations to strengthen my strengths and to make my shortcomings a little less, um, short. He is taking me on a journey, one that is not straight or narrow, but curvy and bumpy and I take one step forward and two steps back...and where God picks me up sometimes and moves me miles and miles...

 

So, for now, I take things one day and one task at a time. Today, for example, I sat down with my coffee at 8:30am and wrote my list of tasks for the day. It sort of looked like this:

 

- Write emails to 8 people

- Write Facebook messages to 6 people

- Look into mint.com to track finances

- Finish and mail Thank You cards

- Meet friend for lunch

- Do laundry

- Write Blog

- Call 10 people

 

And I do these things. I make a list of things to do every day, and then I do them. And that is how I do my part...how I stay committed, how I show myself and God and others that I'm in the game. It's how I breathe...it's how I stay focused while I wait on God to move those mountains into the sea.

 

Here's how you can help me to breathe a little easier, and how you can help God to move the mountains...

 

• PRAY...for me, for the church in Rostock and for my sending church Embrace.
• Post this blog on your Twitter and Facebook accounts using the button up top! :)
• Prayerfully consider supporting me financially...even a pledge of $5 a month will make a difference! Committing to something can seem scary, but think of it like this: You could give up Starbuck's once a month to support me $5, or fast food once a month to support me $10, or eating out once a month to support me $20. Here are ways that you can invest in this ministry:

1. Send your checks made out to ECMI-USA with a separate note with my name, Alison Settle on it to this address:            ECMI-USA
                                                                      PO Box 181
                                                             West Unity, OH 43570

2. Click here, specify me, Alison Settle, and you can donate through your amazon.com account.

3. Or for monthly donations via electronic transfer, send a request by email to rebekah.burkholder@ecmi.org

 

Thanks for reading!

Blessings and Love,

Alison

 



Blessings from Dreamland

Our local weatherman, Bill Meck, took this...the crocuses are
beginning to bloom!

Happy Sunday, all my friends!

My Cats! (Well, I guess this is actually a picture
I took of the cheerleaders, but you get the idea)
They beat the Tennessee Vols today
for their 2nd road game win.

Today has been the culmination of one of my most productive weeks on this path so far. I was able to Skype with one of my good friends, Lara, who is doing her semester of student teaching in sunny South Africa, as well as chat briefly to one of my Rostock teammates, Justin Sismey (see a link to his family's blog to the right). I was even fortunate enough to meet with a friend of mine for lunch to talk about the mission. In combination with getting some other "housekeeping" done, attending church this morning, seeing evidence of the beginning of Spring and watching the Cats beat the Vols, I am feeling really encouraged!

In essence, I have felt nothing but pure, blissful thankfulness towards God this week...I have been able to do so much with His help. To those of you who know me, you would agree when I say that I am an unorganized, fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants type of personality. I am never really engaged in the details of life, and I often spend my time sort of piddling around, procrastinating until the absolute deadlines to accomplish things. But lately, God has put this desire in my heart to really get down to business...to get my stuff together and start becoming a self-motivated, time-managing, productive person. I am convinced that this is God's way of preparing me for the life of a missionary where the work is sort of, well, ambiguous. Where there's no corporate boss breathing down your neck pushing for certain tasks to be accomplished. Where I am working individually, but as part of a team, to build relationships with people and to build up the Kingdom of God through whatever means He chooses to use. Though there are certain quantitative ways to measure success, such as church attendance or weekly giving stats, most of it is unmeasurable and immeasurable works of the heart. So, I believe, God is leading me to develop skills that will aid in this.

I recently enjoyed doing something I never thought I would want to do...I bought an agenda. A little green book where I am scheduling my day, and on many days, I am scheduling it to the hour. And by golly if I haven't accomplished every stinkin' thing I put in there! Everything from emails and exercise to birthday parties and lunch box packing, it's in there. I suddenly feel like every task that comes my way is accomplishable. I end my days exhausted, but rewarded in knowing that I am that much closer to making my dream of missions come true. Quick, slightly disturbing fact: I sat down to watch TV to unwind this week, and I found it a waste of time. I turned it off. WHOA.

The agenda. What a week!

But above and beyond it all, the blessing that has brought me to the point of tears several times this week is how many friends and family members have come forward and expressed their desire to support me in this work. It is natural to fear this daunting process that I have begun, especially with the knowledge that you are entirely at the mercy of God and the kindness of those around you. Very little can be as faith-building as relying on that, especially in this American culture where we are taught to be in control of every aspect of our lives in order to be successful. And here is the news, if I can hold the tears back long enough to type it...

In the past week, I have had 4 people/families pledge to support me for a total of $400 per month! That is nearly 10% of my budget in...if I may remind you..just 7 days!!

This weekend, I attended a retreat for the Alpha course I am currently a table leader for. There came a point where it was time to pray for each other regarding whatever matter was most important, and when it was my turn, I literally went through everything that has been going on in my life, and had nothing I wanted to ask God for...my heart was practically bursting at the seams with all my gratefulness and thanks. I asked the group, "Would you just help me to praise God?"

If I ever needed confirmation that I am headed in the direction that God wishes me to go in, this week has been it. I have never worked harder, felt more blessed, been more excited or felt more joyous than I am in this very moment! To all those out there praying for me and this stage of my life...Thank you and please don't stop! It's working! To all those that are out there reading this blog...God is real. :)

If you want to help and join in this ministry that God has called me to do, please:

• Continue reading this blog and praying for me, this mission and for the church in Rostock.
• Send me an email here or leave a comment with your prayer requests so that I may be sharing in the blessings that God is giving me. :)
• Prayerfully consider supporting me! Although I have experienced so many blessings of success this week, I still have a ways to go, and I can't do it without your help!

Here are ways that you can give (all donations are tax-deductible and you will receive a receipt):

1. Send your checks made out to ECMI-USA with a separate note with my name, Alison Settle on it to this address:            ECMI-USA
                        PO Box 181
                  West Unity, OH 43570

2. Click here, specify me, Alison Settle, and you can donate through your amazon.com account.

3. Or for monthly donations via electronic transfer, send a request by email to rebekah.burkholder@ecmi.org

Many blessings and thanks to all of you for joining me on this journey. Keep reading! :)

Love,

Alison

How to Train Your Missionary Candidate (Who Is Almost as Dangerous as a Dragon)



My iPhone tells me that Spring is almost
here, and I believe everything my iPhone
tells me to believe. Just kidding! I only
believe what Steve Jobs tells me to believe.



Hello, friends and family! It's practically March, which means it's practically Spring, which means soon we can all start enjoying NOT being cooped up in our winter slumber cabin's anymore.

This particular post, I wanted to brief everyone on quite a large milestone I just completed in this process.



The view from my hotel in Reading, PA.
On a clear day it was really great!



Last Sunday, I packed up the car with my suitcase, my laptop, my ECMI member's handbook and a little (read: LARGE) bundle of nerves and made a leisurely jaunt (haha) to the fine state of Pennsylvania for our missionary candidate orientation. Perhaps flying would have been a more convenient option for some, but I actually enjoy driving...the solitude, the scenery and the ability to play whatever music I want however loud I want. It was actually not a bad drive, in fact...barring the moment when I realized I had driven over 20 miles in the wrong direction and had to turn around. After about 10 1/2 hours, I reached my destination: New Holland, Pennsylvania. After a few scary moments spent dodging unexpectedly numerous Old Order Mennonites in horse and buggy's, I arrived just in time to snag some delicious lentil stew and begin meeting everyone.

Little known fact: Although I have been involved with ECMI-USA since January 2010, I have only ever met one person, once. I met the U.S. Director, George Brown, at Urbana 2009 when he was manning their promotional kiosk, but since then, I have made the entire journey over the phone, internet and through a little something they call "mail." You actually use "paper," put it into an "envelope" and then put a "stamp" on it. Somehow, the parcel manages to physically arrive where you have sent it, though I think this is all a conspiracy. ;) Anyway, after all these different forms of communication, I actually got to meet almost all of the staff and board of the wonderful organization that I am working with.

The week was filled with more information than I could ever have imagined, but it was all so interesting. I finally understand the general structure of this international organization and it's policies. It will certainly be a learning process that will continue on for some time, but I now feel very official...something about meeting everyone and Skyping to several different cities and countries has made everything seem much more real than it did in the past. I wanted to also share with you some things that were said that I found to be especially enlightening.

Sometimes (and I think this is very natural) I wonder about this call that I believe has been put on my life...am I right? Is this actually what God wants? During one of our seminars, George Brown (you can find his blog here) said this in regards to missions:

My co-candidates, Helen and Bob. They will be
working in mobilization and here in the States.

"Many are willing to go, but planning to stay.

                  Few are planning to go, but willing to stay."

I immediately felt totally secure in my move into missions, as I fully identified with the second line in that statement. I have never desired to stay in my current position...I absolutely am willing to stay if that is what God desires, but I have always believed that God placed a desire in my heart to GO. I have been chomping at the bit for 3 years!

My other co-candidates, Dan and Anna, who will be
working in beautiful, sunny Spain!

During a Skype meeting with the ECM-International director, Chris Wigram, he quoted an author as saying that in Rostock, "People have forgotten that they forgot God." How powerful is that? Here in the States, we often pray for revival in our churches. We ask that those who have fallen away from the God will rediscover Him. In Europe, especially in former East Germany, there is no longer enough residual knowledge to even ask for a revival. The atheistic communist regime left the younger generations without even the ability to recognize well-known stories like Noah's Ark or Adam and Eve. They are literally back at square one. So in that way, some parts of Europe seem a lot like other unreached people groups that you would find in highly isolated places like Papua New Guinea...just food for thought.

In other news, I have received some verbal commitments for support from friends and family members! I am absolutely overjoyed!! It is still early in the game for me, but I am so excited to see that God is truly being faithful in providing for my call.

Please pray:

• That those who have made verbal commitments and those who are praying about supporting this mission will follow through in whatever way that God is leading them.
• For members of my team, Justin and Kristin, that they would continue adjusting well to their new life in Germany, and that they would recover some supporters that they have lost since reaching the field.
• That my current church, Embrace, would continue growing and that we would soon find a building that we can call our own.
• About supporting me financially and/or in prayer. Thank you to those who are already praying! God has really been evident in the past week or so!

Ways that you can give:

http://www.ecmi-usa.org/donate-now Click here and designate that your gift is for me, Alison Settle.

Make checks payable to ECMI-USA and mail to:
European Christian Mission International-USA
PO Box 181
West Unity, Ohio
43570-018

And if you'd like to set up donations via electronic transfer, send a quick note specifying my name, Alison Settle, to the above mailing address or to the email here: rebekah.burkholder@ecmi.org

Blessings, pals!

Alison